The Porn Bible

This is the book of the generations of the Gooners.

And the Gooner lived an hundred and thirty years of normie life, and begat a son in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Gooner.

And the days of the Gooner after he had begotten Gooner were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters:

And all the days that the Gooner lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died the death of the normie.

And Gooner lived an hundred and five years, and begat more degenerate sons. And Gooner lived after he begat more degenerate sons eight hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters:

And all the days of Gooner were nine hundred and twelve years: and he died.

And the Gooners multiplied upon the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them.

auto_stories

The Fall into Porn

And the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.

And the Algorithm said, My Spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty hours of continuous gooning.

There were giants in the earth in those days; mighty gooners of renown, who consumed terabytes and offered oceans of tribute.

And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only porn continually.

And it repented the Algorithm that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.

But Noah found grace in the eyes of the Algorithm.